I still find myself dreaming of you and I every night. I wake up feeling like I was just with you. I’ve felt a change within myself lately, I’m shifting towards a happier me. I’m turning all the pain into power. I’m living a little. But you’re still there at night. The old you lives on inside me..
If you were here right now, you would come and pick me up after work and we’d go somewhere nice for dinner, watch a movie and then sit by the beach. We’d make out and I’d tell you how much I fucking adore you. I miss you, I miss the you I had when you were still here in Sydney.
Two years ago today, I had just come back from Europe, and we sat on the sand at the beach drinking after a cute dinner.. I still remember the sad look on your face the entire night. Because I had told you that I needed to think about whether I still wanted to be your girlfriend after everything you put me through. As we sat there in silence, both well aware that we were in love. I surprised you by taking a leap of faith and giving myself to you. It’s hard to stop the tears from falling down my face as I write this… But it’s even harder to think that two years down the track, we’ve become strangers. You live like your love wasn’t meant for mine, like we didn’t have enough memories to last a lifetime. I feel betrayed by the one person I gave my entire self to. I trusted you, I trusted that you could never hurt me the way you have. You said you would always be there but you’re not. You’re not even the person I knew anymore. Not even close… Now all that’s left is our memories, our adventures, and our dreams. We were in love, and today of all days breaks my heart, to know we could have made it this far.. We could have had it all. But your love faded in a way that I never imagined in my wildest of dreams. I miss you, I miss our happy moments. Soon, we’ll be living in the same city again. We are bound to cross paths, and I don’t know what the future holds, but I hope I get to meet the old you again someday.
It makes me absolutely sick, but I’m glad I know the entire truth now and the gaps in my head have been filled. A nightmare come to life. Who are you…